hiatus - moving house

I'll be away from the World Wide Web for a while. Taking a week off from work and help family move house.

goodbye my lovely kois

1st of May kicked start to a busy month as my family is moving house. Don't ask me why, it's a long story. The saddest part is we are going to miss our kois dearly. We had them for 6 years and it's time for them to move on to a better home, a spacious and properly dug-up pond. You see, our kois are really special, they had grown so big and huge even though they only live in a water storage tank. My dad's theory is that they eat too much and lack of exercise. With their sizes the tank proved too small and there is not much room for them to move about.






Goodbye my lovely kois. It's gonna be really hard to part however it's for your own good. Wish you well in your new home. Missing you already.

boomerang

Just when you think things are finally going towards improvement, it turned around and crashed on you. You questioned the reason why this is happening, trying to find the root cause, trying to understand, moreover trying to justify. The more you questioned, the more unsatisfied you are. Why is this happening now? Why does it not happened before when things were so much worst? Why do they not questioned the previous chap who has not done anything except talk cock and no action when he is supposed to be a role model? Why now when I am involved?

It's like a boomerang, when you think you had thrown it far away, it comes back and hit you, hard on the head. And you wonder why you of all the different people in the past 2 years? There is no answer. You need to solve it once and for all, to make sure it will not come back and haunt you again.

In the midst of the chaos, you found that people does not like you, reasons being, unknown. Not helping your self-esteem at all.

A childhood friend once told me life is like your fingers, there are ups and downs. People say not to worry, you have been down so it's time to go up. But how far down is down? Can it go any worst?

missing March

Without realising it's already April, mid-April. Where has March gone??

the promotion

Got the news right before Chinese New Year. I've been promoted to Assistant Manager. It was 10 minutes before a meeting starts that I was being informed. It was my last working day before I go on leave, both me and my boss were busy with last minute arrangement for people to cover us during our Chinese New Year off days (remember I'm working in a 24/7 call center - we never sleep - plus we are supporting international customers so Chinese New Year is no big deal), so we never get to discuss the details. I did text my boss after I left office asking about it however he mentioned that we will talk about it when I get back to work. Back to work after the festive season, there's the backlog and pending cases waiting for us to attend to, of course.

Then suddenly I'm being informed that they are already expecting me to work up to my new title. WTF. Already? Just like that? I can't do an overnight change. It's not fair. I have not even got the official words. Just a few days back from Chinese New Year I have a thousand and one things to do. Everything needs attention, everything needs change, everything needs me to think and come up with a plan for the better, now. I have the backlogs, the monthly monitorings, the new responsibilities, not to mention the handover of my work to others. I told my boss that I am not doing it until I get the letter.

I guess I was kind of expecting it to be like in the movies; the boss calls you into the office, hands you a letter and tells you that you have been promoted, followed by the handshake, creating "the moment", the boss will be smiling, you will be surprised and happy and excited at the same time but because you're in front of the boss you tried to act professional to hide the glow on your face and the excitement inside, you'll be skimming through the letter looking for the new pay figure. Too much TV influence.

Finally got my official letter last week with a disappointed payrise. I was secretly hoping HR would drag longer until I finish my backlogs.

The new title is real nice. There is much to the meaning though. The title itself carries much responsibility. This is a big step for me. Moving from doing pure operations work to reporting and analysis, a huge difference. A BIG step.

Suddenly I realised what I'll be doing. I am now *in* the management, [GULP] entry level. Geez, scary. I really got a lot to learn, so much. What do I know about analysing the daily reports, forecasting, projection. Presenting facts and figures to management, saying the right words at the right time, convincingly. I can't even do formulas in Excel without reading the Help notes.

The more I thought about it, the scarier it gets. I do not want to imagine what is in store for me. I am expected to perform and set an example. I don't know why I am so negative, I have always been positive to accept challenges when it comes to my capability of doing things.

The truth is my boss is happier about the promotion than me. He kept asking whether it's good for me. Of course it's a good thing. I mean of course I wanted to be in this position and I know I am going to be one day when I am ready. This time it just caught me off guard, unprepared. I don't have any real managerial exposure. For the past two years, either the boss is too busy getting presurred from higher management to produce reports after reports or the boss is too busy socialising within the organisation, and I have been doing all the operational work.

Welcome to reality check girl, not everything goes according to the book. Yeah, only when it happened to you personally then you know.

This is a tough challenge. I am keeping my fingers crossed. Just wish I don't embarrassed and make a fool of myself. Wish me luck.